The joy of feeling thunder rumble deep in my soul
Without fearing the the force of the tremors within
How lucky it is to feel peace as water falls from the sky
While never getting wet, only staying dry
To relish in the cool breeze while staying warm in my skin
It is a great privilege to love a storm
My body has never been my own
I am too loud, too much
Then how come you don’t hear my screams
I am too big, unattractive
Then why is my body a distraction
Why aren’t I safe
I wear rolls of soft armor puckered with markings and flaws
I don’t want to be desired. I didn’t ask
For this body, this gender, this life
I did everything right
Or wrong
Which one is safer?
I choose that
My body has never been my own
We are all just temporary occupants of this world
We all rent our physical space so am I just subletting mine?
A poem
Where do I begin? How do I start?
A royal we sounds passive, a cop-out.
Using you is belittling, accusatory
Saying I is selfish…even if I am the one speaking?
How do we know to listen if we’re not included?
Is it even for you if no one told you?
Why is it only about me because I am the one speaking?
This is my experience
Take what you will
We ALL get to decide what’s real
Inside Thoughts Out Loud 